Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
