Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Randomize
