I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
