atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
