I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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