next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Randomize