Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
