Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
