If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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