all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Randomize
