My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
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You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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