You're so nebulous sometimes
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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