What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
It's blow job season.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize
