Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I have feelings that need drinking.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
