Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I checked into jail on foursquare
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I just found a bag of teeth...
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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