Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Randomize
