I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize