Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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