Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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