they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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