Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Randomize
