You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
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fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
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I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
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