I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
