I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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