DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
