But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I touched a dick in church today
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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