Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize