let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
