So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
