Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Randomize
