you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.