I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
