oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
