I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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