Say something about gay babies.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
why is half of my head shaved?
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