This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
They should really pass out barf bags in church
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
