Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Randomize
