so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
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He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
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if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
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