He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
