the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
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I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
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my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
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