Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Dignity is for republicans.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
Success! We fucked roommates!
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize
