I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize