google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
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