I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Randomize
