I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
