Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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