Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
We need to rekindle our bromance
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Randomize
