We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
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