I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Randomize
