pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
