He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
