I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Randomize
