butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
