is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Randomize
